I found some internet

I've been meaning to post this album for a little while now as a follow up to the Slint post, but my internet keeps leaving me and I keep going to work. Bummer, right? Anyway, this is an entrancing Louisville post-rock album comparable to Spiderland, except harder and less eerily piercing. The 12 minute epic The Everyday World of Bodies has probably earned a spot on my list of all-time favorite songs.



Rodan - Rusty

And, here's a couple of albums by a similar sounding band that formed out of the ashes of Rodan, June of 44:



June of 44 - Tropics and Meridians



June of 44 - Anahata

Official Stance #1: Rape Ain't Cool Guyz

This is the first in a long line of Official Stances. A new era is upon us.

Now bros, I understand that sometimes you really need to get your rocks off. But rape is not the answer. You might have had one too many Sparks, or maybe you thought she gave you the once-over. Let us not assume that because she is the drunkest one there that what you're doing is a good idea.

And now for a heavy metal flowchart.

This Must Be Pop

I like Dismemberment Plan.  I don't like The Promise Ring.  With those bands all but broken, in this karmic punarbhav, Maritime has emerged to please the abandoned fans of those bands. 

Upon first listen, you will probably think this album sucks. No one appreciates a good pop album anymore.  And, of course, you'll have to excuse the lead singer.  Listen again.  It pays off.

Oh, and Eric Axelson plays bass.

Catchy, fun, adductive, cute, surprising.  Enjoy.

We, The Vehicles - Maritime (MediaFire)

Party of Helicopters Megapost

Frequently it seems pretty reductive to say this is my "favorite" band. Who can have a fav these days? Pitchfork even shat all over this band. But this band balances irony and earnestness, and adds a healthy dose of shoegazey vocals and pop hooks with their vaguely metallic post-hardcore riffage. Their guitarist is a personal idol of mine, though he now plays drums in Teeth of the Hydra. What a waste. Another member is in Beaten Awake. They're aight. You'd probably like them more than I did. Here are the major releases. I have some spare mp3s I'll up if I feel like it.



Party of Helicopters- Abracadaver



Party of Helicopters- Mt. Forever



Party of Helicopters- Space and How Sweet It Was



Party of Helicopters- Please Believe It

A Voice Like Rhetoric- Ethos

Uploaded this while watching a gorilla hug Mr. Rogers in anthropology class. Gorillas are so sweet.
This band is some really mathy emo with solid pop hooks.

Super Comf (Dances With Costner)

So I haven't written anything in a while. I was gonna post links to my favoritest band ever, but I only have half of them up, so I'll do it later. I think I'm changing phases for a little while musically. I'm still gonna play the same stuff, but I think I'm gonna start listening to more mainstream rap. I just got The Blueprint, The Black Album, and King and I think I understand why the kids were calling these albums "hot" a couple years ago.

I've been contemplating the importance of authenticity and irony lately. Maybe this is because I just watched entire episodes of Bromance and The City. These reality shows are pretty inauthentic, moderately entertaining, and possibly significant. Quality art or art that aims for higher meaning never really has the cultural import that something for the masses possesses, ultimately making it less signficant. This art can really only hope to influence people in the future into recreating that art into a streamlined populist format that probably moderately shames the original. But enough about The Strokes.

I failed to get krunk during the MLK break, despite a small batch of Sparks nestled safely in my night stand. I hear Milledgeville is a hoot though.



And where does Kevin Costner show up in this mess? I doubt Kevin Costner gets krunk these days, and his art lacks sociocultural import at the moment. But Dances With Wolves probably won awards of some kind. The City will not do so. Which has had more import?

NO sWAYze!

It's the beginning of the year, and, as usual, everyone's getting all excited about what's to come, what with the upcoming political facelift and the new Rock of Love (will that Bret Michaels ever find his rock of love?). So, natural to this time of the year, speculations and predictions are abound. Ours were just some off-handed casual observations (keep 'em in mind all the same, though, folks, and make good stock choices), but some upped the anty with their 2K9 forecasts in both topic and scope in unexpected ways:

The 100 Most Likely People To Die In 2K9

Bold! No surprise on some of those (although I think at this point we can agree that Amy Winehouse will keep going just to spite us all and that Keith Richards is immortal), but I'm rather distraught to see my favorite philosophical bouncer, Patrick Swayze, ranking with over a 50% chance of death (for real, this time). Surely it can't yet be time for a post-Swayze world! But, we still have so much to learn from him about dancing in both dirty and spectral ways. How about Whoopi Goldberg instead? And this comes just as I was considering adopting a new slaw mascot, too:

Bummer, but at least our beloved avatar, Mr. Berry, still stands a good 91% chance of surviving the year. Keep on fighting, you ol' slaw and prostitute lovin' rocker.

Oh, and poor Joe Francis - who will supply us with inordinate amounts of drunken tits when he's gone?

Well, anyway, now that we know what our odds are of losing our celebs, we can adjust, anticipate, and move on early so that we don't hit any bumps down the road to throw off our stride this year like Heath did to us last year. So, mourn now if you must, but come Barry's inauguration and Bret's new rock, we need to be movin' on and movin' fast - let's get the fuck done with the 0's already!

Lonely roasted peanuts

Got this a while ago, listened to it, generally liked it, forgot about it, remembered it, listened to it again, loved it, kept listening to it. This album's a good one to throw on if you just feel like lying on your bed and thinking about shit (or not) while listening to some music, which is what I've been feeling like doing lately. It's quiet and relaxed, with the singer somberly slurring depressing lyrics full of analogies of discontent and a general desire to sleep (fittingly enough), but most songs eventually build into a calm, yet rocking climax. Lyrics aside, it's not necessarily a depressing album; the vocals tend to take a backseat and blend along with the rest of the music in a way that gives it all a more easy-going, contemplative feel, which is what drew me to it.



Bedhead - What Fun Life Was

Scrubbing pots with fingernails

I finally came across this today, so of course I need to share it with everyone. Given my unholy love for Slint, I'm surprised I've gone this long without it. Absolutely wonderful in its brooding instrumental creepiness, it's one of those releases that are unfortunately short (just 2 lengthy tracks), although I suppose the sentiment applies to the band as well. Anyway, here it is, Slint's self-titled EP, enjoy:



Slint - Slint EP

This post is not cynical

I was going to get on here and bitch about showing up to work a day early and having to walk back in the rain, but I've noticed too much negative posting lately. There's no need for us to constantly abuse our imaginary audience. Instead, I'm just gunna suggest grabbin' yo' special lady, boardin' up the door tightly against the cold, lightin' some incense, burnin' it down, and chillin' out to some Steely Dan (mmm, that's nice...):



Steely Dan - Can't Buy A Thrill

This post is sober

You ever get sleepy in the evening and take a nap that leaves you unable to sleep at 3AM? More accurately, you ever get stupidly drunk, stay up late, end up somewhere you don't live, walk home at 8AM, drink coffee at Waffle House along the way, and, upon failing to get back to sleep due to a caffeinated whirlwind of thought-processes attempting to piece together last night's ridiculousness, concede to just going about the day's business riding on little sleep, which leads to you crashing at 8PM and being stuck awake at 3AM with work drawing imminently close? Yeah, right, me neither, but if I did, I'd sure feel dumb and awkward - almost as dumb and awkward as the phrasing and length of that last sentence.

However, if I were stuck awake at 3AM due to a series of events that made me feel dumb and awkward, I'd probably be listening to some chill instrumental, jazzy, electronic post-rock, like this:



Tortoise - Millions Now Living Will Never Die

EDIT (by Chris):

Everyone knows the best Tortoise album is TNT. Let's substantiate this. WWPD? (What Would Pitchfork Do?) Pitchfork's near-canonical Top 100 albums of the 90's listing, posits TNT as the 91 best album of the epoch.

Apparently, ATP likes Millions, though, as Tortoise played the album in its entirety for ATP's "Don't Look Back" series (which inspects classic albums through live sets of whole albums) at All Tomorrow Parties' First festival in New York. Either way:



Tortoise - TNT (Mega Upload)

Also, Tortoise's one-off collaborative album with everyone's favorite solipsist, troubadour Will Oldham (as Bonnie "Prince"Billy), is interesting, if only for the vastly reworked covers.



Tortoise & Bonnie "Prince" Billy - The Brave and the Bold (Mediafire)

Can Someone Party Too Hard?

So I passed out on xanax. I had some antibiotics. Things happen Anyway, I woke up and there was a party to go to. We knew one person, but that's all you really need. We get there, there might be 15 people, and college football is happening on the t.v. Not mindblowing. So we me and Steve here decide to drink their alcohol in large quantities. Somebody had to be interesting right? So we get drunk and we decide, hey we have sharp semi-choreographed dance moves, and this place is going nowhere fast. The Mae Shi techno remix is put on and we bust out the moves.

Merriwether Post Pavillion does not deserve a 9.6.

So we dance, and we dance well. Everyone is generally amused, the shirts come off and come back on, everything you might expect. And then some dude from another rooom struts up and says,"I don't live here, but I'm the only one not pussy enough here to tell you that you're no longer welcome." Crude, eh? He said he had nothing against us personally (and no logical grounds to kick us out) but that we should leave. We tried to reason with them, but it's not like we could tell them they were dull and embarrassingly boring people. So we left.

We went to the apartment where the person we originally knew resided. We were offered multiple intoxicants when someone received a phone call saying they felt really bad about kicking us out, so much so that they wanted us back. Who can turn that down? At least we could fuck with'em right?

So we go back and knock on the door. The response we received was what we shall call exceccively hostile.

"What are you fuckers doing here? Didn't you understand the first time you're not wanted here? You know I used to be an indie kid too."

"He's right, he helped produce some of Cartel's first songs."

"Oh boy, you've got some massive cred. Cartel huh?"

Steve jumped in at this point and began mediating. We more or less respectfully left... until

"Look at that faggot still standing out there in his white pants! He looks like he still wants to fight."

I didn't, until he brought in the pants. If he's not secure enough in his masculinity to wear white pants, he should confront his problems on his own time. Now I wanted to fight.

"Nick it's not worth it."

"He brought in the pants."

"There are six of them and two of us."

"I can take the first one, and that all that matters."

"Look, I've seen these fights, they don't end pretty."

"Goddammit Steve, fine. I understand you're being rational, but I really wanna kick his ass. He brought in the pants."

"I understand, but you wouldn't just be taking him, you'd be taking his five friends too."

"Ok."

So to handle this rage, I'm gonna post my favorite punk album ever. Enjoy.



Hot Snakes- Audit in Progress

Slaw Team Drunken Force

So, it looks like we might be adding some more to the slaw-force. This one's a lot more interesting than us, so get excited. He does art n' shit. It's way authentic. Like, he'll draw shit - good shit - and then just post it. He might even say something clever, too. You guys are so privileged. He's sitting next to me drawing alt-art right now, while Nick's just passed out like a bitch. Right, well, I'm drunk, so I'll go ahead and skip to the rock before I spurt out something silly...TITTYBALLSBITCH! Well, dammit..



This is what we're listening to right now. It's some German garage rock with hilarious mono-tone singing.

Teenage Panzerkorps - Games for Slaves

Addendum

Alright, I just got up off the ground and switched musical gears, so here's what I've got for ya:



Chill German stuff, 'cept it's Can, so you can expect some weird jazzy stuff, too. I'm gunna go fall down and space out to this now.

Can - Future Days

Thoughts on rambling

I should probably preface this post by throwing it out there that I'm feeling a bit loopy right now on account of hangovers and empty stomachs and pills and what have you, so don't be surprised if this post doesn't entirely make sense or seems rambling. Thank you for your cooperation.

Anyway, I think - that is to say I'm pretty sure - that what I was going to post about was this site and its futures. I'm feeling a spark of e-interior design, and this drab black look just isn't doing it for me, Chuck Berry withstanding. I'm thinking of something more artful for '09, more authentic. I've been thinking about this, because this is the sort of stuff I think about since'n I have no life during the daytime. This past week of debauchery has been somewhat of an inhibitor in the carry-out process, though, so I don't even think I have any ideas. All I can really decide on is that Chuck Berry stays. Also, more snide remarks. I cant think of any right now, but I'd give an example if I could. iuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuubrh htn6jyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy8m90

Sorry, that was my head. I guess I'll stop now. Um, I'd give you some music, but I've just been listening to Cap'n Jazz, which I already posted, and I can't think of anything else to post. bummer. Maybe later.

Predictions for 2k9

So it seems like last year everyone was all atwitter about African-American presidential candidates, ambient punk, electro, neon, the mainstreaming of skinny pants, and the inexplicable rise of post-rock inflected black metal, among other things, what can we look forward to in the '09? Veganism and snobbery appear to still be on the rise. I would predict cocaine is going to continue to rise, while weed shall experience a slight downturn in industry, with maybe an increase in price as well. Sparks will no longer be in existence, meaning stimulants will probably be good stock to buy. And we now know 2k9 is the year of the Butt, so feel no shame for coming in the backdoor. I doubt Barry Obama is gonna get shot just yet. Odds are troops'll stil be chilin' in Iraq. Probably more electro. But we'll also get a fresh dose of Mastodon. But until then, this can tide you over.




Cinemechanica - Rivals EP

2009: The Year of the Butt

How's everyone feeling about '09? Anyone's life been altered yet? Anyone had any existential revelations or worldly experiences yet? Anyone got any sweet poontang yet? Me neither, so I'm about ready to call it quits on starting a new life in '09. I mean, the turn of the new year saw me standing on a roof with 3 people I didn't know, trying to decide who has the shittier hometown (probably me). Not exactly an auspicious start. So, I'm just gunna go ahead and consider the 0's my bye-decade and put my base face on (and get my hat of loan) for the teens, even it if they are going to be cut short at 2012. Fucking Mayans.

Alright, enough slaw, here's some rock:



Nick's not gunna like this one, but he can go suck a dick for a mimosa, because I love Deerhunter. Anyway, this is their first album, and it's much more noisier and rockin' than their other two. Also, it has a funny name, which is always a plus.

Deerhunter - Turn It Up Faggot